<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Ow. by jyn-z-solo (jynzandtonic)</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22624507">Ow.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynzandtonic/pseuds/jyn-z-solo'>jyn-z-solo (jynzandtonic)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Rise of Kylo Ren (Comics)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Jedi Academy (Star Wars), Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Angst, Angst and Feels, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, F/M, HEA not included, Inappropriate Use of Star Wars Fruit, I’M SORRY OKAY, Jedi Ben Solo, Jedi Reader, Jedi Temple (Star Wars), Jedi Training (Star Wars), M/M, Mentioned Luke Skywalker, New Jedi Academy, Other, Padawan AU, Padawan Ben Solo, Padawan Reader, Padawan!Ben, Padawan!Reader, Reader-Insert, Sexual Tension, Soft Ben Solo, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, UST, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Young Ben Solo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 08:54:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,703</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22624507</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynzandtonic/pseuds/jyn-z-solo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>As his teeth pierce the fruits skin, a small moan you think wasn’t meant for you escapes his mouth. “Kriff, I haven’t had one of these in—” he pauses, his eyes closed, “—years.”</i>
</p><p>  <i>“I’ve never tried one.”</i></p><p>  <i>His eyes open, meeting yours a bit too hungrily. “Never?” he asks.</i></p><p>  <i>“Never,” you reply.</i></p><p>  <i>“Here,” he says, holding the shuura fruit up to you. “You have to.”</i></p><p>  <i>You walk over to where he stands, hand lifted, still offering the fruit, but your gaze falls to his lips—plump, red, and shiny with juice.</i></p><p>—————————————</p><p>  <b>You and Ben Solo are both 23-year-old Padawans, partnered in the rigors of training at Luke Skywalker’s New Jedi Academy. You’ve sensed the conflict and darkness in Ben before, but it’s never changed how you feel about him—in fact, his humanness and vulnerability has only drawn you in closer.</b></p><p>  <b>When you surprise him with a special treat during your afternoon sparring session, your mutual attraction comes to a head... but there may still be a galaxy’s worth of distance keeping you from him.</b></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/You, Ben Solo/Reader, Ben Solo/You</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Ow.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Oneshot prompt-fill for @solovalkers on tumblr!</p><p>HOOKAY, I got a little carried away with this one but I’VE BEEN SO SHOOK OVER THE RISE OF KYLO REN #3 because 1) our BABY and 2) those COLLARBONES so basically this turned into a feelings-dumpster of my Rian-Johnson-spin-the-lightsaber headcanon and angst over Ben getting FRAMED for masterminding the destruction of Luke’s Temple. Here we goooo!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Ow.”</p><p>Ben bares his teeth, rubbing at his upper arm gingerly where the training remote droid had just hit him with a sting beam. He raises his saber once again, dark eyes illuminated by the blue glow of the blade. The hovering orb rotates tauntingly before firing off several more rounds in rapid succession. Ben blocks eight blasts in a swift series of parries, but the ninth hits him just below the ribs.</p><p>“<em>OW</em>!”</p><p>He snarls, raises his free hand, and swings it wildly away from him, using the Force to fling the offending training remote into the wall.</p><p>“Well kriff, Solo, if I knew <em>that</em> move was fair game…” you say, a smile tugging at the corner of your lips.</p><p>Ben’s eyes shoot up to yours as you enter the enclave, his expression softening. “You’re late.”</p><p>“Would there have been anything left to train with by now—” you gesture down at the smashed remains of the remote droid scattered across the floor, “—even if I’d showed up on time?”</p><p>A flicker of shame crosses his face. “I’m sorry. Lately I’ve felt like I can’t control my…” He pauses and blows out a slow, heavy breath. “I’ve been letting my emotions get the better of me.”</p><p>You’d seen moments when Ben’s frustration crystallized into rage before. You’d recognized the darkness—recognized it because you acknowledged its presence in yourself.</p><p>“<em>Hey, you’re okay</em>,” you assure him. “C’mon, you’re not a gonk droid. You have feelings. You get angry. Just means you’re human.”</p><p>He drags a hand down his face, looking exhausted. “When I blow up like this—it just scares me sometimes.”</p><p>“You don’t scare me. And if Skywalker heard half of what comes outta my mouth when I get hit with sting beams, he’d turn into a Force-ghost on the spot.”</p><p>Ben huffs out a small laugh and shakes his head. While Ben is generally studious and reserved, you’ve always known how to coax a smile out of him. In fact, it seems like you’re the only one who can.</p><p>The two of you share afternoons alone here frequently; being two of the eldest and most highly-skilled Padawan learners at the New Jedi Academy has made you a natural pair for daily exercises. But beyond your compatibility as sparring partners, there seems to be a magnetic draw between you and your fellow Padawan—a sense of mutual understanding with something more raw and volatile crackling beneath the surface.</p><p>“Anyway, I was late because I picked something up for you. Or picked a half-dozen younglings <em>off</em> something for you,” you grin as Ben raises an eyebrow.</p><p>Reaching into your robes, you produce a golden-yellow shuura fruit, floating it up from your palm and over to where Ben stands.</p><p>Whenever a bushel of off-world fruit is placed out in the Temple’s dining hall, all the Padawans rush to claim them—and at that, a lone shuura only appears in the assortment once or twice a year. You remembered Ben mentioning shuura fruit was his grandmother’s favorite and—judging by the look of delight on his face when he plucks it from the air—you think it might just be his favorite, too.</p><p>“You…” he says, smiling wolfishly. “You wield dark powers I may never understand.”</p><p>“Well I’d have to kill you if you did,” you say, stone-faced—only cocking an eyebrow deviously when you can no longer contain your laugh. “Now go on; it’s all yours. Then we’ve got saber drills to run.”</p><p>“Thank you, [Y/N]. Really.”</p><p>You simply nod, feeling the pleasant hum of the shared energy between you.</p><p>He raises the shuura to his mouth, and as his teeth pierce the fruits skin, a small moan you think wasn’t meant for you escapes his mouth.</p><p>“<em>Kriff</em>, I haven’t had one of these in—” he pauses, his eyes closed, “—years. It must be eleven, twelve years at this point.” He takes another bite of the creamy, golden fruit. “The last time was when I was a child visiting Naboo with my family.”</p><p>“I’ve never tried one”</p><p>His eyes open, meeting yours a bit too hungrily. “Never?” he asks.</p><p>“Never,” you reply.</p><p>“Here,” he says, holding the shuura fruit up to you. “You have to.”</p><p>You walk over to where he stands, carefully stepping over the shrapnel of the training remote. His hand is still lifted toward you, offering the fruit, but your eyes fall to his lips—plump, red, and shiny with juice. Without realizing it… you wonder how <em>they</em> would taste.</p><p>You’re face to face. He’s still offering the shuura. You should take it from his hand.</p><p>You see a small bit of juice dribbling down his wrist toward the cloth wrappings on his arms.</p><p>Instinctively, you grab his forearm—your tongue catches the sweet bead of liquid on his skin, licking its trail up the side of his wrist and hand. He inhales sharply, lips slightly parted. Still holding his arm steady, you take a bite of the fruit. The creamy, honeyed taste fills your mouth and your gaze flits up to meet his. Ben’s pupils have blown wide, his eyes completely black.</p><p>You take another bite. Ben’s jaw clenches as he watches you. Shuura juice dribbles from the corner of your mouth and he lifts his free hand, wiping up the drip with his thumb. Your eyes are locked on his as he brings his thumb to his mouth; his plush lips wrap around the tip as he sucks it clean.</p><p>Before you can blink, your back is slammed against the wall, the shuura tossed away, Ben’s lips finding yours. They’re soft and full, and the way your mouths move together is unpracticed, inexperienced—but desperate with the need for more. You feel the air around you thrumming with Force energy.</p><p>His tongue dives into your mouth greedily as you tug at the neckline of his robes, desperate to reach more of his skin. You kiss down the side of his throat, sucking a wet mark on his exposed collarbone, and his hands find your ass, hauling you up to his waist—the weight of his broad frame pinning you against the cool stone behind you. Your legs wrap around Ben’s body and you grab fistfuls of his raven hair, pulling him closer as he grinds his hips into yours. He moans—it’s an entirely different sound than the one he made before, more of a growl from deep in his chest—and you swallow it, crushing your lips against his again.</p><p>Ben shifts his feet underneath him, still kissing you fervently, and—<em>CRUNCH</em>. He steps on a piece of the remote droid he’d smashed earlier. The noise startles you both, and the spell is broken.</p><p>He pulls away from your lips looking terrified.</p><p>Your feet find the ground again. His hands still linger at your hips, but his eyes don’t meet yours.</p><p>“Ben… <em>Ben</em>?” You bring a hand to his cheek.</p><p>“We can’t,” he whispers.</p><p>“Ben. <em>Look at me.</em>” His eyes, light brown again, bore into yours. He looks younger when he’s scared. “Is it because of the old Jedi Code? <em>Kriff it</em>, Ben, <em>let the past die</em>—this connection we have, we—”</p><p>“<em>I know</em>. I feel it too.”</p><p>You draw in a ragged breath as he steps away, his chest still heaving. You can still feel where his warmth lingers on your body.</p><p>“We’re a new generation of Jedi—we don’t <em>have to</em> follow the old ways,” you continue.</p><p>“It’s not just the Jedi Code, [Y/N]. <em>I</em> can’t,” he replies.</p><p>“Then <em>why</em>,” you grit your teeth, every cell in your body screaming for you to close the distance he put between you. “Why not?”</p><p>“There’s… There’s too much dark in me. There always has been.” Ben looks pained. “And I can’t stop it. I’m no good, [Y/N]. You should stay away from me.”</p><p>“I meant what I said, Ben. You don’t scare me.”</p><p>“I know.” A half-smile ghosts his expression. He grazes your cheekbone with his fingertips, and tenderly draws his thumb across your still-swollen lips.</p><p>He turns on his heel, straightening his robes, and walks out of the enclave—casting one more longing glance at you as he leaves.</p><p>..........</p><p><br/>
You feel unbalanced. Your head had been spinning since your encounter with Ben, so you decide to take an off-world mission to collect artifacts at Master Luke’s behest. A few days of space travel and and rifling through old ruins would be just the thing to clear your mind.</p><p>Though you normally appreciate the solitude of independent missions, the days feel longer and the silence seems louder this time. At night, you toss and turn, feeling homesick—but not really for a <em>place</em> you can put your finger on. By the time you’ve collected what you set out for, you’re anxious to get back to the Temple. <em>To Ben</em>.</p><p>..........</p><p>From the moment you drop out of hyperspace, you can tell something is wrong. The feeling of unease grows as you descend through the atmosphere. While landing, you can see flames through the viewport of your ship.</p><p>The Jedi Temple is burning. There’s no trace of any of the Padawans, but your thoughts are fixed on just <em>one</em> of them—you reach out and don’t feel Ben’s Force signature. You don’t feel <em>any</em> Force signatures. Panicking, you sprint toward the gathering of stone huts where the two of you lived.</p><p>Only a pile of smoldering rubble remains where Ben’s hut had stood, and tears begin to prick at your eyes. The <em>Grimtaash</em>, his ship, is gone. You stumble further down the path to your hut. Nearly half of its structure has collapsed, leaving a gaping hole exposing the interior.</p><p>Amongst the wreckage of the dwelling that was once your home, a spot of yellow catches your eye. You look down, and perched on a charred stone is a single, perfectly-ripe shuura fruit.</p><p>Picking it up, you see a small scroll tucked underneath. Ben’s calligraphy is instantly recognizable. His neat lettering spells out only two words: <em>Forgive me</em>.</p><p>Hot tears spill down your cheeks as you fall to your knees. Your voice barely a whisper, you look up to the stars.</p><p>“<em>If only there was anything to forgive</em>.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I’M SORRY OKAY BLINK TWICE IF YOU WANT AN E-RATED FIX-IT</p><p>——————</p><p>Come say hi on tumblr @jyn-z-solo xoxo!<br/>Prompts welcome!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>